114: HOW TO STOP BEING JUDGEMENTAL

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[socialpug_tweet tweet=”There are no stupid people. Just your perception of them doing what they’re doing, because in your world you would never operate that way. But they’re not you. – Ilan Ferdman”]

There are moments in life when you may feel frustrated, annoyed, or challenged by another person's behavior.  We may find ourselves labeling others in our heads as ‘stupid', ‘idiot', ‘incompetent', or something similar.  And if we allow ourselves to look more closely, we may realize that not everyone operates the same as ourselves.

How to end the habit of being judgmental

  1. Explore your self-talk and journal about it!
  2. Accept the ugly, weird, messy parts
  3. Look deeper into people and situations, win flames & soul mates
  4. Be critical about your judgmentalism
  5. Ground yourself with mindfulness
  • Don't pass judgment.
  • If you find yourself being judgmental, stop yourself…
  • Understand. Instead of judging someone for what he's done or how he looks, try instead to understand the person…
  • Accept. Once you begin to understand, or at least think you kind of understand, try to accept…
  • Love.

How to Stop

  1. Realize that we are not perfect.
  2. Know that judgment is for God to do.
  3. Judge yourself, not them.
  4. Be more empathetic.
  5. Help them rather than judge them.
  6. Know them better.
  7. Mind your own business.
  8. Stop the hate.
  9. Be humble.
  10. Get rid of envy.
  11. Love them.

Signs you are judgemental

  1. You believe that everyone is out to get you.
  2. You expect other people to be consistent all the time.
  3. You struggle to see beyond a person’s flaws.
  4. You easily skip to conclusions.
  5. You struggle to tolerate ambiguity and uncertainty.
  6. You’re intolerant of people unlike you.
  7. You’re generally pessimistic about life.
  8. You tend to believe people are either ‘good’ or ‘bad.’
  9. You struggle to truly appreciate or see the beauty in others.
  10. You have low self-worth.
  11. You feel anxious around other people.
  12. You’re suspicious and untrusting.
  13. You have a strong inner critic who judges you.

In this episode of the Old Souls & Seekers podcast, Ilan and Guy Ferdman explore the importance of feeling more and thinking less. During this discussion, you will discover how our perceptions of the way people operate may lead to emotions of anger and frustration, increased stress levels, and keep us from feeling centered and emotionally free.

Learn new ways to overcome judgmental obstacles and realize that there are no stupid people, simply our perception of how others operate.

Links:

 

The Cliff Notes:

  • Ilan and Guy share their personal experiences on how to cope with stress and the perception of stupidity.
  • Get excited about moments that trigger your anger, become self-aware, and use them as an opportunity in letting go of the emotional effect.
  • Meditation can center you to prevent the feeling of anger from running away with you.
  • People aren’t “stupid” just because they don’t do things the way you do.
  • Alignment comes from the body, not the mind.
  • Ilan and Guy share their personal stories on family members moving and separating, and why feeling into these experiences is important to your emotional well-being.
  • Creating real memories in short bursts of time can be more meaningful than seeing someone every day.
  • When you feel hurt, just know that your heart is going through its process. Applying logic with your mind to the situation when the heart hurts is not a cure for healing.
  • Not being able to remember things can reduce emotional connections to forgotten memories.
  • Deep sadness can help you feel a new experience and connection to people and moments.
  • Attachment can leave you feeling trapped and longing for freedom. For example, babies aren’t trying to annoying us on purpose when they cry. They are simply beings of love expressing their emotions.
  • It is OK to NOT complete everything at the moment.

3-Key Points:

1.) Use meditation to center yourself to prevent triggers of anger from bothering you.

2.) People are not necessarily “stupid” just because they do not do things the way you do.

3.) There is no ownership of any people, places, or things in this world.

[socialpug_tweet tweet=”Feel more, think less.” – Guy Ferdman]